I’ve thought about how I was going to write this a few times, what I was going to say and how. But how do you go about explaining how you’ve just dropped how the face of the earth to those you’ve never really met and some you have but you do care about?
So as I sit here wondering what to write I thought the best thing to do would be is to just start, I could always edit out what didn’t sound or feel right. Here goes…
I should probably start off with the fact with that although I am a very outgoing and personable person when it comes to personal… my personal stuff, I stuff it down. I mean deep down, I don’t talk about it, I barely even think about it (if I do, I just stuff it down deeper). I’m not saying whether it’s good or bad, I’m just saying it’s the way I’ve always been as long as I can remember. That being said, something came to light about my life about 6 months ago at least emotionally and let’s just say I didn’t deal with it. I didn’t even really talk about it. It was just there. I did what I always did, I put a smiling face on and put everyone else first.
That worked for a while. Especially because my crafting has always been an outlet for me. I mean I had started some form of it since I was about 8 years old. I’ve always loved watching my creations take shape to their final beauty. However, about a month ago I went to walk into my craft room and I just couldn’t do it. The very thought of it made me want to hate it. When you can’t even force yourself to go into your sanctuary something is most definitely wrong!!! It was at this point I knew I had to take a step back and do some reflecting.
I have to confess, I’ve never been a diary/journal girl. NEVER!! I tried when I was little. It never took. I don’t know what I have now is what I would call a diary/journal as a venting/journey into self-discovery book. I had to be able to work things out in my mind, which sometimes meant just being able to write down my conscious stream of thought.
I’m not even going to say that I’m ready to dive back into creating. Wanna know why? Ok at least one of the reasons.
This junk pile you see is my “craft space”. Would you be inspired?
See that opening to the right? That goes to my foyer.
See the opening to the left? That goes to my bedroom.
This used to be my nephew’s room… 5 years ago, when he lived with me. Guess what it’s going to be now? If you guessed craft room…ding! ding! you win a prize. I’ve got some MAJOR plans, which has me somewhat excited about the idea of getting to craft again. I’ve already got some of the stuff picked out so I can do some MAJOR organizing. That’s the part I’m really excited about.
I read a post today by Margie Romney-Aslett. I’ve met her in person and she is such a very sweet person. And I got to thinking after reading her post that you would never know that about her. And that’s just the thing we never know the inner turmoil each of us are going through. And I have to say I’ve been on my share of roller coaster rides lately, most of them have seemed to be going in the spiraling downward position.
There are those of you there that have thrown me a lifeline in many different forms. You have no idea what it has meant to me and I can’t even begin to say thank you. I can only hope that one day I am able to do the same for you in some small way.