Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Getting Personal

I’ve thought about how I was going to write this a few times, what I was going to say and how.  But how do you go about explaining how you’ve just dropped how the face of the earth to those you’ve never really met and some you have but you do care about?

So as I sit here wondering what to write I thought the best thing to do would be is to just start, I could always edit out what didn’t sound or feel right.  Here goes…

I should probably start off with the fact with that although I am a very outgoing and personable person when it comes to personal… my personal stuff, I stuff it down.  I mean deep down, I don’t talk about it, I barely even think about it (if I do, I just stuff it down deeper).  I’m not saying whether it’s good or bad, I’m just saying it’s the way I’ve always been as long as I can remember.  That being said, something came to light about my life about 6 months ago at least emotionally and let’s just say I didn’t deal with it.  I didn’t even really talk about it.  It was just there.  I did what I always did, I put a smiling face on and put everyone else first.

That worked for a while.  Especially because my crafting has always been an outlet for me.  I mean I had started some form of it since I was about 8 years old.  I’ve always loved watching my creations take shape to their final beauty.  However, about a month ago I went to walk into my craft room and I just couldn’t do it.  The very thought of it made me want to hate it.  When you can’t even force yourself to go into your sanctuary something is most definitely wrong!!!  It was at this point I knew I had to take a step back and do some reflecting.

I have to confess, I’ve never been a diary/journal girl.  NEVER!! I tried when I was little.  It never took.  I don’t know what I have now is what I would call a diary/journal as a venting/journey into self-discovery book.  I had to be able to work things out in my mind, which sometimes meant just being able to write down my conscious stream of thought.

I’m not going to say I’m cured.  IMG_2674

I’m not even going to say that I’m ready to dive back into creating.  Wanna know why?  Ok at least one of the reasons.
This junk pile you see is my “craft space”.  Would you be inspired? 
See that opening to the right?  That goes to my foyer.
See the opening to the left?  That goes to my bedroom.
Lovely right?!?!

Ok… next….

IMG_2676

This used to be my nephew’s room… 5 years ago, when he lived with me.  Guess what it’s going to be now?  If you guessed craft room…ding! ding! you win a prize.  I’ve got some MAJOR plans, which has me somewhat excited about the idea of getting to craft again.  I’ve already got some of the stuff picked out so I can do some MAJOR organizing.  That’s the part I’m really excited about.

I read a post today by Margie Romney-Aslett.  I’ve met her in person and she is such a very sweet person.  And I got to thinking after reading her post that you would never know that about her.  And that’s just the thing we never know the inner turmoil each of us are going through.  And I have to say I’ve been on my share of roller coaster rides lately, most of them have seemed to be going in the spiraling downward position. 

There are those of you there that have thrown me a lifeline in many different forms.  You have no idea what it has meant to me and I can’t even begin to say thank you.  I can only hope that one day I am able to do the same for you in some small way. 

Sara-290On that note, I will leave you with a smile and VERY BIG & HUGE SLOPPY HUGS!!!

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13 comments:

JenMarie said...

{HUGS} to you sweet gal!
Hang in there!
We MUST meet soon...I mean we're ONLY about 1 1/2 hrs apart!!

StampinCathy said...

Hugs and Happy Thoughts coming your way from me. I can't wait to see your do room and you getting back into crafting. If I can do anything for you...PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE let me know.

Ashley Nguyen Newell said...

Giant hugs to you sweet friend! I love you and I'm here if you need anything! <3

Ashley Nguyen Newell said...

PS this is also what my crafting area looks like

Christi Snow said...

((((hugs)))) I wish that I could help...give you a hug in person or help you shovel your room ;o)

I think that a change with your room will be a huge step in getting back in there. Change can be amazing for reviving your spirit. LOVE you girlie!!! smiles...

Basement Stamper said...

So glad to see you posting! I miss chatting with you and I have no clue what is going on but I was starting to think I had lost a friend, I hope that is not the case! I'm here for you if you need to chat about anything! BIG HUGS!!!

jpmayo said...

love you girl!

FibreJunky said...

Major, huge, gigantic {{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}

I wish I could be there to give them in person. I'm not going to write too much here, but I hope you know you can always talk to me. Those roller coasters of which you speak? I am extremely familiar with them. There is nothing you could say to me which would shock me or make me think less of you or any other thing that might be going through your mind.

Much love!!

lynn said...

wishing you all things good in life, sara--take good care of yourself:)

Savannah O'Gwynn said...

I've wanted to send you an email--just didn't know if you were getting the other ones! I am so glad to know that you are ok (doing better). Hang in there! You are super precious and so talented--I cannot wait to see what you do with your new craft room! The color and the organizing! OHHH! I would love to come help:) LOVE IT:)

Miss you tons! Let me know if there is anything I can do for you! LOTS and LOTS of hugs;)

Becolorful said...

Sara,
It sounds like you are a pretty together person really. You knew when to get off the ride and you found a way to regroup and clear your head a bit. I think if we are honest we all have some times like this in our lives and some of those lows take a little longer to pass through but we just keep moving forward.
Hang in there.
I stopped by because you had asked me about a tall desk in my craft room. It came from Pier 1. I got it on sale about two years ago. I haven't seen one in our store for awhile but they may be able to order you something like it. I know I got it on sale but I don't remember what I paid for it anymore. I think there may be something very similar to it on Target online.
As for my studio, it seldom looks like that. It is usually in a state of creative chaos. :0
Hope that helped.
Pam @ BeColorful

{jennie} said...

Sara, I think most of our rooms either look like that most of the time or during busy craft times. I know my clutter is something much deeper than simply clutter. I have recorded Peter Walsh's show on OWN network. He digs into the emotional reasons for the clutter.
Good luck with your new craft space. I had the joy of being in the front row at Jennie Black's copic marker class this past summer. Hope to see yoru smiling posts again soon!

Mel M. M. McCarthy said...

I hopped over from twitter to give you some "you-can-do-it!"-papercraftsmag love.

Thanks for such a great read.
After reading this brilliant post, I just have to say, I completely understand what you are going through. That sounds so weird coming from a total stranger, but you so very eloquently described what I've wanted to write on my blog MANY a time. Congrats to you for taking care of yourself & brava for your poignant honesty. Just last night I was feeling so guilty for taking a big step back & mostly just organizing my sanctuary so much recently--when I feel like I should be emailing, blogging, making something to promote some lovely person's art... But thanks to you, I am going to be nicer to myself! I hope you can throw aside any guilt and feel the crafty-mojo-love just for your very own self. You deserve all that and more. Sorry for the rant ;o) & Thanks again for the inspiring words!